I like humidity.

Everyone complains about humidity, but I love it. On a hazy, gray day in a park, you feel like you could twist the leaves like towels and trapped moisture would just drip out of them. I love that.

I realized my love for sticky weather tonight while sadly perusing old pictures from this summer. There was one in particular that John took of me in Central Park that caught my eye. I think it was June and we had gone to see Seu Jorge in the Park. We were late and the line was long, so we sat on the park grounds outside Summerstage and listened. All of fashionably hip New York seemed to be out in their baby-doll dresses and hightops. The sky is gray above the trees and you can almost see the air hanging about my face.

Humidity means things to come. It means the summer is just starting or it's in its peak and there are a million things to do.

Now, it's crystal clear blue outside, the leaves are slowly yawning into yellow and listlessly dropping from branches. What's more, John is gone and I'm starting at R. tomorrow. I suppose this is the hardest part, the in-between. In between my summer with John and my fall on my own.

I could say that I've easily had the best summer of my life here in New York. I've grown up, I think, in many ways. Not only do I now have an article on newsstands in the October TOH issue, but I have learned so much about my future career. Maybe this is not what I want to do after all. Maybe this LSAT class I will take this fall is the best thing I can do for myself. Maybe law school will be hard, but it will be the perfect thing for me. Magazines are not challenging enough for me. I learned at This Old House that a lot of what magazine writing is runs along the lines of a "here's-this-isn't-it-great" blurb. The writing I love, the creative but hard-hitting news through the eyes of an individual writing, seems like it's better sought through newspapers. At any rate, I think I'm taking the right steps and this summer was one giant one.

On the other hand, this summer has taught me a lot about myself. When John and I chaffed and argued a lot in June, I stepped back and examined my behavior. At times, I feel like I ruined my high school relationship because of my hot-headed temper. Although John and I did not stop fighting, I think that the infamous "water-in-the-face" argument (which ended, or maybe escalated, with me drunkenly throwing my "Hers" cup of water in John's face as he sat on the futon) was a wake-up call. I wrote John an apology the next morning and left it for him to wake up to. I realized: anyone I love that much, I don't want to risk losing. I also feel so calm with John now. Everything is so simple with him. He's the most caring guy I've ever known. I feel light-hearted with him and we have fun all the time. Truly, we made this city ours this summer and now I feel like part of the skyline is missing with him gone.

I guess I just feel more adult. I've survived three months so far in New York and I have another three to go. I suppose it's as they say, if I can make it here, I can make it anywhere.